Harry Potter and the Story That Could Have Been
by mbus55
Summary: A fic based on some random predictions that we had at the end of the fifth book. It's out of date now, but whatever, it's just humor. People will die twice, characters will go insane, and lightning will strike more than once. Read if you dare.
1. Dumbledore, Snape, and Pettigrew

**Author's Note:**

_Hi, this is ogreatrandom and looking4clouds. This story began shortly after the release of the fifth book, Order of the Phoenix. We were bored and decided to make a list of predictions for the sixth and seventh books. Oddly enough some of our predictions cam true, some of the more wacky ones definitely never will. But anyway so here we were, three years later and bored again. Finding this old list we had the idea to write this weird little fic. At the end of the chapter you can see a list of the predictions that inspired this chapter. Hope you enjoy it, no flames please!_

**Predication #1:**

"Things are not always as they appear to be Harry. Also I am completely tone deaf."

"I don't understand, pouted Harry, "you never give me any answers because you don't trust me. Nobody takes me seriously… ramble"

Then Snape came in, his cloak billowing around him. He pointed his wand at the two of them and cackled maniacally.

"Ha ha ha ha ha," he laughed, "I have turned over to the dark side!"

"Oh no," Dumbledore said in a pleasant voice.

"It cannot be," Harry gasped, "Dumbledore trusted you for some reason."

"I trusted him because Snape saved my life."

"Not anymore!" Snape said. "I'm here to kill you all! I take orders for Voldemort now!" Then he laughed again and lightning split the sky.

Then Dumbledore pulled a gun out of his robes and shot Snape who fell to the ground with a hole in his head. Then a still grinning Dumbledore turned to Harry.

"You see," he explained, "I'm evil. I will kill you now."

"But why?" Harry cried, "You were the one person left in my life who I could look at as a parent figure! My parents are dead! And so is my godfather! Wah wah!"

"You see I'm evil and now I want to kill you and Voldemort and rule the world!" He pointed the weapon at Harry, chuckling still as lightning flashed across the sky.

To their shock a rat on the floor transfigured into the wizard… Pettigrew. He dove in front of Harry, shielding him from the bullet. Then he fell to the ground, dead.

"NNOOOOOO! He was the last of my father's friends!"

"What about Lupin?"

"Oh yeah," Harry said sheepishly, "it's not a problem then."

"Okay back to killing you then," Dumbledore said raising the weapon again.

"Aren't you out of bullets," Harry asked trying to stall and failing miserably. But Dumbledore really didn't know anything about the muggle weapon in his hand so he pulled out his wand instead.

"Then I'll use this." Lightning flashed across the sky, momentarily blinding evil Dumbledore.

When he could see again Fluffy, the great dog, had someone managed to get into his office. Dumbledore had been cursed since childhood with the inability to sing or play any musical instrument. Unable to placate the dog he soon found himself being eaten alive.

Lightning cracked as Harry watched evil Dumbledore get swallowed by the dog, though he still had no idea how it had appeared.

_Predictions:_

_Dumbledore is evil_

_Dumbledore dies_

_Fluffy comes back_

_Snape reveals himself to be evil, then dies_

_Pettigrew saves Harry, then dies_

_Everything Dumbledore says is important_


	2. Quidditch And More Lightening

_**Author's Note:**_

_Thank you so much to everyone who reviewed the first chapter! Anna Tramell, all-evil-grins, and Silvernight180. Thank you guys so much! We, (looking4clouds and ogreatrandom) are greatly appreciative of all reviews!_

_**Disclaimer:**_

_Neither of us own Harry Potter. Neither of us have ever talked to the owner of Harry Potter. If you don't know who owns Harry Potter then I don't know what you're doing in this fandom._

**Prediction #2:**

The funeral was the next day. It was sad.

"Well, that was sad," Harry said, as it ended. "Now let's play some Quidditch!"

As they walked to the Quidditch field, Hermione tuned to Ron. "It seems like we've done this before," she said.

"Oh right, like Dumbledore could have died twice," Ron laughed.

"Oh my God, it's Krum!" cried Hermione. "Look, there he is!"

They all stared in the direction of her pointed finger. There was the entire Bulgarian team, lined up on the field, and ready to play.

"I didn't know we were playing _them_ today," Harry said, confused.

"Didn't you hear, Harry?" asked Hermione. "The entire Ravenclaw team was murdered by Voldemort last night."

"Oh, right. I forgot," said Harry, slapping himself on the forehead. "Right."

Madam Hooch blew her whistle, and Harry and Ron rushed onto the court, while Hermione took a seat in the stands.

"Ron," said Harry quickly, "why is Ginny on our team?"

"Didn't you hear about the other murders last night?" Ron asked. "Most of our team bit the dust."

"Oh, that would explain Wood being back on the team," Harry said, looking in the direction of the goalposts where a cheery Wood was waving at him. "What're you going to do then, Ron?"

"I thought I'd try out some of my other skills," Ron said, taking out pompoms from inside his robes. "Go team!"

"'ello 'erry," said a voice. Harry turned, and there was Krum.

"I wanted to wish you good luck," he said, "before the game."

"Thanks," said Harry. "Good luck too."

"By the way, did you know I've joined the Order of the Phoenix?" Krum said, nonchalantly.

"Oh really?" asked Harry.

"Well, after I married Er-me-own-ee, it seemed like the next logical step."

"Ron's going to kill you," Harry said, as Ron launched himself from Krum's neck.

Lightening cracked through the sky, as another figure appeared in the air beside them.

"Not if I kill you first!" laughed Voldemort, reaching for his wand. "Avada Kedavra!"

Krum fell over dead.

"Oh no," said Harry. "I hope Hermione's ring is returnable."

"Now I'm going to kill you!" laughed Voldey.

"You can't yet," said Harry, "It's not the end of the year."

"Oh right." Voldemort thought, then he punched Harry off his broom. "See you later!" he laughed evilly. Lightening arched across the sky, as he disapparated.

Madam Hooch came over. "The match is cancelled due to lightening!" she exclaimed, kicking an unconscious Harry with her foot. "Oh, and by the way, Ron, you're the new captain."

"What about me?" asked a confused Wood.

"You're just hot in all the movies," Ron said with a sniff. He and Hermione walked hand in hand off the field, leaving both Harry and Krum's bodies behind.

(but Harry isn't dead _yet_).

_Predictions:_

_- Wood comes back_

_- Krum joins the Order of the Phoenix_

_- Krum and Hermione get together_

_- Krum dies_

_- Ginny joins the team for good_

_- Ron becomes Captain_


	3. Insanity In The DA

**Author's Note:**

_"Hey! We're baaaaack…Thanks to all who commented-hope you enjoy the newest batch of craziness (or scariness, whichever you prefer :-). Be prepared for more death (but not Harry yet, of course!), more predictions, and much, much more lightening._

_Thanks again everyone, and remember, comments always appreciated!"_

**Prediction #3:**

After two very confusing days Harry was glad just to be having a nice and normal DA meeting. He couldn't remember why they were still hiding if Umbridge had left but he was sure there was a good reason. After all, he was Harry Potter, and he always knew what he was doing.

"Why are we still called '_Dumbledore's Army_' if Dumbledore turned evil and then was eaten by a giant three headed dog?" Neville asked as they all gathered in the Room of Requirement.

"Well," Harry answered, "I just got the shipment of DA sweatshirts in the day he died so it's too late to return them." He began handing said sweatshirts out.

"Come on everybody," he urged, "put your sweatshirts on."

"You know," Hermione commented to them as she shrugged hers on, "it would have been much cheaper if I had just made us all sweatshirts instead of you ordering them all."

"No thanks," Ron shivered thinking of the hats and socks that Dobby now wore.

"Don't worry about it Hermione," Harry hurried to add, "we wouldn't want the house elves not to get their freedom."

"That's true," she mused.

Just then Harry's ex-girlfriend Cho stormed into the room, her face streaked with the cascade of perpetually falling tears that ran down her face. In the distance they all could have sworn that they head the sound of thunder rumbling morosely somewhere close by.

"Cho," Harry gasped, "I thought you and all of the other members f the Ravenclaw Quidditch team were killed by Voldemort!"

"They kicked me off the team just an hour before he came to kill them all," Cho explained her lower lip quivering dangerously, "they said that my endless and unstoppable crying was overdone and that they were keeping from playing properly." She blew her nose loudly.

"That's horrible," Harry felt a few tears leak out of his own eyes. After all, Harry himself had been through a great many trials in his few short years of life. So many hardships that had made his life-

"Harry," Hermione said sharply, "are you brooding on your tragic past again?"

"No," Harry muttered mentally adding Hermione being mean to him to his list of trials that he'd suffered through.

"Besides," Cho cut in, "I've had a more tragic life." Harry's eyes narrowed and he gave her quite an evil glare.

"No you haven't," Harry argued. Then he went on a rant that lasted several hours detailing every sad thing that had ever befallen him. When he had finished all but Cho had fallen asleep. Cho was balling her eyes out.

"I've decided to quit the DA and leave Hogwarts," Cho sobbed, "and then," she took a deep breath, "I'm going to kill myself!" Again Harry distinctly heard something that sounded like thunder.

"But why would you do that?" Harry gasped, thinking how horrible it would be for him if his ex-girlfriend killed herself. Why did these things always happen to him? He didn't hear Cho's long rant, which she herself sobbed through.

Just then, Dumbledore's brother came in. Lightning silhouetted him as he stood framed in the doorway. Harry and Cho gasped in surprise.

"I'm here to take you away," he said holding up a straight jacket.

"No!" Harry cried shrilly waking everybody else up. "I'm not crazy! I'm not crazy! I'm not crazy!" He repeated this in a singsong voice until Ginny hit him over the head with her broomstick.

"I'm here to take Cho Chang away," Dumbledore's brother clarified pointing at the sobbing girl. "She's suicidal and we have to make sure she doesn't bring any harm upon herself."

"Are you some kind of psychiatrist?" Ron asked.

"No I just own a mental hospital," he pulled the straight jacket over Cho and dragged her out of the room. "See all of you soon!" He called as he left.

"I wonder what that meant?" Neville pondered aloud as he waved bye-bye to the nice man.

_Predictions:_

_- the DA continues_

_- Cho becomes suicidal_

_- we will meet Dumbledore's brother at some point_


	4. Not Crazy!

_**Author's Note:**_

_Okay ogreatrandom here! Thank you to everyone who reviewed in the last chapter! They were all very nice! Thanks to Queenofinsanity, snigglesaurus, all-evil-grins, and Black Roses of death._

_Okay, in case you didn't know, (I forget if it was mentioned before), looking4clouds and I switch off every chapter. This one is written by looking4clouds and I just had to take a moment to say that every time I read this it kills me. I think it's hysterical! Anyway I hope you all enjoy it!_

**Prediction #4:**

A few days later, Harry was alone in the common room, rocking by the fire ("Not crazy, _not crazy_") when he heard a knock on the portrait door. Curious, he got up to open it.

There stood Lupin.

"Uh, hi," said Harry. "You know, you're probably not supposed to be here. All these murders and Voldemort running rampant and all."

"I know," said Lupin brightly. "I just wanted to chat for a bit. Why don't you come out into the hallway with me?"

The hallway looked dark and scary and deserted. Somewhere, a cricket chirped.

"Okay," said Harry cheerfully. "Sounds great."

He stepped outside and the portrait swung closed with a snap.

"I, uh, brought someone here to meet you," Lupin said quickly. It looked as if he was kicking the thin air.

"You…did?" asked Harry. (not crazy, not crazy)

"Yep, he's _right here, isn't he??_" Lupin said through gritted teeth, kicking the air next to him even harder now.

"Umm…"

"Okay, okay!" shouted the air by Lupin's side. "I'm here, I'm here." In a second, an Invisibility Cloak was whipped off, and there stood…

"Sirius Black?" Harry asked, puzzled.

"Umm…no I'm actually Mirius Slack, his half-broth—ow, ow, okay, I'm Sirius!" the man said, rubbing his shin. Lupin had a satisfied look on his face.

"Harry, Sirius is here to tell you something," he said brightly. "Now it's been great to see you and all, but I've just gotta run…" he bolted down the hallway, muttering something that sounded a lot like "Thank God…maybe that little brat'll leave me alone for once now," under his breath.

"Um, hi Harry," said Sirius. "I guess this might be, uh, quite surprising to you, huh?"

Harry ran up to him and hugged him tightly. "I knew you'd come back, uncle Sir-ie!" he said happily, ignoring Sirius' wince. "Now we can be together _forever_."

'White as snow' was quite an accurate description of the expression on Sirius' face. "Yeah. Okay, kid." Sirius pried himself out of Harry's grip. "Look, there's something I have to tell you."

"But I thought you were dead," Harry said suddenly, just getting the picture.

"Well, I was only kind of…mostly dead," Sirius said quickly. "Aka hiding from _this_," he mumbled to himself. "Anyway, I come back to you now at the turn of the ti—oh screw it, look kid, there's something important I need to tell you, so listen and _stop trying to hug me_."

"Sorry," Harry said, pouting, stepping back.

"Dumbledore never really told you about your family, did he, Harry?"

"Yes he did!" said Harry, "They were murdered by Voldemort!"

"Voldemort didn't murder your parents, Harry. He murdered his great-great-great-great-great-grandmother and grandfather!"

"No!" gasped Harry. "Then that would make him my—"

"Yes," said Sirius. "He's your great-great-great-great-grandson, from the future."

"Wow, cool!" said Harry. "I have another family member, wheee!"

"And you get married," said Sirius, rolling his eyes. "God help us."

Ten miles away, in a secret hide-out, Draco Malfoy brought the horrifying secret news to his master.

"Master, we have the information you were seeking," he said quietly. "Our spies intercepted Black on his way back to the Caribbean, and he told us everything."

"Yes?" came the snake-like hiss.

"It seems that your great-great-great-great-grandfather is none other than…Harry Potter. Black also added a 'haha, sucks for you.'"

There was silence, and then a wave of lightening split the sky. Voldemort fell to his knees, and the forest around them was rocked by an unholy scream.

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"

_Predictions:_

_- Sirius Black comes back to life_

_- Harry is related to Voldemort_

_- Voldemort is from the future_

_- Draco Malfoy works for Voldemort_


End file.
